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VDS: The Vlad Zone (NOT for the faint of heart!)

Twilight Zone intro. (via xiete)

 

Good evening.  I am ursula.  20808391_medium

via i155.photobucket.com


 

 I may look like Rod Serling but that's because you have stepped beyond the boundaries of ordinary perception. You are now in that part of the Twilight Zone where numbers make people laugh and cry, where goat boys freely interact with Swedes. You are in

The Vlad Zone.

 

Today we have for your consideration three professional bike racers:

The first is Vlad Gusev, a Russian of the Astana team.  VDS cost: 16 points.

The second, Vlad Karpets, also Russian but from the Caisse d'Epargne team.  Cost: also 16 points.

Finally I give you a third Russian, one Vlad Efimkin of the AG2R team.  His VDS cost is 14 points.

Three Russians, three of the best all-around bike racers in the world.  The get paid well for their efforts .  They also undergo drug tests over and over.  But besides being Russian and bike racers, they share a terrible secret:

None of them have earned one &^%*#*@!!^ing VDS point this year for their owners.

What would cause these three solid bike riders to be such duds?  is it bad luck or is it because they are named Vlad?  Maybe its the name that's so important depending on the year..

Consider bike riders named Andy (Schleck, Kloden, Klier) have earned 987 points and their VDS cost was a combined 40 points, 6 less than the Vlads.

Or take The Als- Ballan, Petacchi, Valverde, Botchorov, and Bertolini.  They've earned a combined 1879 points- even with Petacchi getting busted.

What is going on here?  Are the Vlads being singled out for their name and heritage? Will any of them get on track this year and save their VDS owners from abject humiliation?  How about the other riders who've taken a generous bite out of the bagel this year: Sam San and Sastre, Burghardt and Cobo? Allan Davis and Lopez Garcia? Rodgers and Hunter? Kolobnev, Mancebo Perez, and Fat Graeme Brown? Will TD ever get a point? How about Horner, Millar, Feillu, Petrov, and JJ Haedo? Time is getting short so you VDS owners make some predictions: who will escape The Vlad Zone this year and who won't?



 

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Numerology!

That’s the reply of the year lynne!

by ursula on Jun 26, 2008 10:54 AM EDT up reply actions  

If ever

there was a time to use the recommend function…

"If writing too much about the Classics is wrong, I don't want to be right."

by Chris Fontecchio on Jun 26, 2008 5:27 PM EDT up reply actions  

OY! URSULA!!

I’m Norwegian, thank you very much. And Goatboy is really more of a lamb once you get to know him

Nice post though. While you have been afflicted by the Vlads, My worst disease ridden decision was Valjevic. 10 whole points of pack fill.

Or Booooooooooooooonen, but that’s another story…..........................

by tshawytcha on Jun 26, 2008 8:28 AM EDT reply actions  

Amazingly

None of those guys are on my VDS team. How did that happen Jens?

"Hey, hey, settle down boys and girls or Krusty will have to bring out his old friend Corporal Punishment again."

by Drew Davis on Jun 26, 2008 10:31 AM EDT reply actions  

Yes

but none of them have come down with exotic diseases either, just run of the mill broken bones.

by Hons on Jun 26, 2008 10:36 AM EDT up reply actions  

Maybe it's got something to do with our DS

"Hey, hey, settle down boys and girls or Krusty will have to bring out his old friend Corporal Punishment again."

by Drew Davis on Jun 26, 2008 12:17 PM EDT up reply actions  

Just for the record

I almost picked all three Vlads but wound up picking none of them. Whew! See a nickname I have at work is Vlad the Impaler because of the um gusto I put in my work as an acupuncturist. That’s why I thought about picking them…

by ursula on Jun 26, 2008 10:56 AM EDT reply actions  

If you don't get that nickname

as a tattoo, you’re just going through the motions.

"Hey, hey, settle down boys and girls or Krusty will have to bring out his old friend Corporal Punishment again."

by Drew Davis on Jun 26, 2008 12:18 PM EDT up reply actions  

Ursula is now Vlad the Impaler

"The most wasted day is that in which we have not laughed."

by nikki on Jun 26, 2008 12:58 PM EDT up reply actions  

And Vlad's brother...

hasn’t done much for me either!

Kolobnev will be the next Russian I ever pick!

Racing for Victory and Free Beer!

by DemonCats on Jun 26, 2008 3:14 PM EDT reply actions  

Yep!

Kolobnev is just ripping up the VDS charts!

by ursula on Jun 27, 2008 3:02 PM EDT up reply actions  

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