Bike Commuter Banned for EPO

Reached later for comment, "Worms" Vermicello said that taking CERA turned out to be a huge risk. "If the inspection on my H2 wasn’t still good, I’d’ve been unicycling my little buns off for the next few weeks. Or putting training wheels on my bike." Mr. Vermicello is banned from riding 2-wheeled, human-powered vehicles for the next two years. His wife refused comment, but was overheard to beckon him off of the phone with hints such as, "Come over here, bad boy. We need to conduct a test."

Officials in Seattle emphasized that commuter doping is taken very seriously. Performance-enhanced commuting is widely believed to lead to widespread tax fraud, with individuals contributing to the bottom lines of their employers in excess of the assumed hourly rate at which they are taxed. A single doped commuter can thus cost the city or state tens of dollars in a very short time, eliminating much-needed improvements. "We need some of the perks they have in the Detroit mayor’s office," one city staffer was heard to say.

I feel sorry for Mr. Vermicello. It’s easy to point fingers when you’re not in his situation.

As someone who has to commute from my bedroom to my home office every morning, I understand the pressures to dope. I blame the organizers of my commute for making courses so difficult that the only way to stay alive is to dope.

Just yesterday, my wife put an Hors Categorie climb of dirty clothes within the first two steps of my commute. I HADN’T EVEN GOT OUT OF THE NEUTRAL ZONE YET!!!!

So what am I supposed to do? I have to make a living, therefore I dope to overcome the challenges of my commute. Just like Mr. Vermicello did.

We all live in glass houses. Stop throwing stones.

if you come too early to work???
Whoa! Here you would get praised for the good job….

I don’t get this case at all, if the guy is a a senior software engineer, I understand drug tests, but EPO tests?!?

know about this or even suspect? They are just as guilty for turning a blind eye.
And what about Vermicello’s co-workers? Competition for being early perhaps fostered his change in behavior. I blame the SW Engineering union for not having the balls stand up to big business and demand fair and adequate testing for ALL commuters.

Chris – thank you. :-)

I really wouldn’t put it past an Acrobat team member getting caught. I’m just happy it wasn’t somebody from Team Photoshop or Team Illustrator! ;-)

Even though everyone is being tight lipped over at Sun Microsystems, it has been well documented their position towards a more open platform of userability. They have a history of being very accepting of any strong bike commuting software engineers regardless of their previous issues they might have had.

If this move does take place, it will no doubt place Openoffice.org in a much better competitive position during the Lunch Ride World Cup ProTour series whichis aggressively contested by those from Apple, Cisco, and Specialized.

When we contacted Vermicello, he refused to speak about his case. “I made some bad decisions in the past, and I am sorry for that. I am prepared to serve out whatever suspension the SADA gives me. I am now tranquillo about this whole thing.”

When asked about the possible Openoffice.org connection, he did say he rode with Sean Poulley at a convention last year and was really surprised at how the guy could hold his pace. He thinks that may have to do with the better weather in California compared to the Seattle area. “The fact is, the winters here in Seattle really sucks for commuting.”

All of us here at the PdC will be sure to keep you updated as this story develops.

In response to the recent scandal at Adobe, many other cyclo-commuters have been speaking out about the difficulties. One rider, asking to remain annonymous, said: “They are assassins! The real problem is not the CERA or the EPO, it is the length of the commute. Bothell to Adobe in Fremont requires riding the full length of the Burke-Gillman trail, including dodging students on the UW campus. Tests and bans won’t make the problem go away, we need affordable housing closer to where the jobs are. As long as commuters are forced to ride murderous routes in order to earn a paycheck, they will turn to the “suitcase of courage”. Le dopage, it’s just a symptom of a larger problem.”

Senior managers with Adobe had little to say about this point of view. “He knew the rules, and he broke the rules. Affordable housing? Next thing they will be wanting health care and retirement pensions.” At this point, Adobe PR staffers ended the interview.

I am so done with software. This whole thing just makes me sick…. And what do I tell my kids? I mean they love the flash animations and games on the PBS.org website, but now? I don’t want them exposed to this crap, so I guess I need to dig my old amiga out of the garage and try to find a copy of Where in the world is Carmen San Diego…somewhere….

What’s that?

This smells like a conspiracy. It’s nothing but a terrible witch hunt. The testing lab is corrupt, and Vermicello’s surely been framed! Where’s Howard Jacobs when we need him? The humanity!!!

nice one

Has already been said… dammit.