Santa Rosa Sucks...
if you are a pro bike racer, or someone from out-of-state mistakenly thinking you are attending a bike race in that "California" place you see on your teevee in shows such as Bay Watch, or maybe if you are a homeless person... But if you came prepared, Santa Rosa was a wonderful place to spend the afternoon.
It may come as a surprise to anyone who watched the race, but it rained today! It rained a lot. Biblical amounts of rain. I was expecting frogs to start falling from the sky any minute, but alas, no frogs...
After a wet drive north, I arrived a bit too late for the Ladie's race (that Emilia is cute as a button. Wow. Jens, do they all look like her there? Cause that might explain why some of you stay there in the winter...). But, I did see the Men come through. They were... well... they were wet. Very, very wet. Wet like an Irish well-digger's ass... or is that "cold" like an Irish well-digger's ass? It probably doesn't matter because either way it's totally accurate.
Me? I was neither wet, nor cold, because I came prepared, remember! Here is my ToC 2009 in-person race attendance checklist...
- Waterproof boots? Check!
- Waterproof pants? Check!
- Waterproof jacket? Check?
- Waterproof gloves? F*ck, forgot those...
- Twitter-enabled Crackberry? Damn right!
So to cut to the chase, or the lack of a chase as it turned out... Mancebo managed to win after an epic, but nearly spoiled, solo and soggy breakaway. The surprisingly large, but unsurprisingly cold and wet crowd, went f*cking wild when the man finished, his wet arms raised high, with a huge, huge wet grin on his wet face. You could tell that nobody, except Nibali and the Belgian kid, were even chasing, so the racing was pretty limited. But the break away survived. Don't see that every day...
Well, thought I, the race is over now. It's pouring rain. It's getting dark. My hands are cold. What to do? Maybe I should go back to that Russian bar that crashdan mentioned in his "places to meet up" thread? But on the other hand, why don't I just walk through that open gate right over there leading onto the course right in front of the podium stage? The gate through which all the photographers are going, you ask? Why yes, that gate...
Next thing you know, I'm standing front and center in the photog scrum, three feet from the stage, right behind the VS cameraman, and here come Mancebo to get his yellow jersey. It's me, the guy from Getty images, the CNN dude, VS camera guy, probably someone from Gazetta della Sporto, and two dozen soggy others all equipped with multiple cameras with these massive lenses, blah, blah, blah. Me? I have...
- Crackberry (with built in flash thank you very much)
- My trusty Sony Cybershot DSC-T5 (which does video!)
I was a new-media field reporting dynamo, baby! Tweet, tweet, tweet!. That's what I'm talking about my tweeches!
Now all these pro photogs have on these official bibs that say "Official ToC Pro Photo Person", or something like that. Meh. Not me. No bib necessary. Just a blue North Face jacket, yellow PVC rain pants ($14.95), and a take-no-prisoner look on my face. In truth, I'm standing there figuring one of the pro guys is going to rat me out any second and some race official is going to grab me by my soggy backpack and kick my ass out, but then I notice the 4 ft 6 in Laotian grandmother in the purple and tan plaid jacket standing to my left... and I knew I was safe. So I relax, take some shots and a little video while they give out all the jerseys, and settle in to my new-found profession... International cycling new-media twitterati field guy! Who needs press credentials when you have dumb luck? Not me, that's who, or "that's not who"... or whichever is better (Gav, edit please?)...
So here is my official report... It rained a lot. Mancebo got all the jerseys except the "Best Young Rider" (Gesink) and the women's race winner jersey (Emilia, blink, blink, sigh, blink). And then Basso got one for something... "Cutest Smile"... "Best Kisser"... "Best Reformed-Ex-Admitted-Almost-But-Not-Really-An-Actual-Doper on Liguigas"blah, blah....
My work day finished, I went back to the Russian River Brewing Company to see if I could find crashdan (look for a maniacal youngish Colonel Sanders looking guy with glasses and a brown leather hat I'm thinking) but all I managed to find was another excellent Leffe-like Belgian style blond ale, which, in a selfless jesture of solidarity, I dedicated to the fine people of Australia who got jacked up recently.... moment of silence... Then I drove home, stopping at In-N-Out on the way, (just like Horner apparently did), and put on my Snuggie. Oh, Snuggie, why do I love you so?
Night all...
P.S., I don't really have a Snuggie.
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Excellent report, and I don't even know what a snuggie is
Had I known, it would probably be even funnier.
Me neither but the P.S., I don't really have a Snuggie
Made me laugh
Some say the best things in life, are one the inside.
I googled
It seems to be a lot of different thing. Hmmmm…
Bork, bork, bork!
by TheFigurehead on Feb 16, 2009 4:40 AM EST up reply actions
It seems to complicate this whole "Swedish sin" thing
Bork, bork, bork!
by TheFigurehead on Feb 16, 2009 10:56 AM EST up reply actions
Unbelievable
that could have come straight from Idiocracy.
But great story, and it’s amazing how luck and being confident can get you places you never thought you would be able to go…. Now, the name of the game is, can you do it again???
I was living of a very slow phone connection to PdC and twitter today for the race… at one stage I thought Jens!
so tell me, Where is Lances bike?, I know you are doing a deal to swap for the Prize Pinarello
We don't stop playing because we grow old, we grow old because we stop playing.
George Bernard Shaw, 1856-1950
+1. If you look confident enough you can breeze into most places,
like CycleGirl’s hotel at Alpe d’Huez, past the security cordon and the crowds of CSC fans straining for the slightest glimpse of cyclist ;-) Brazenness is the name of the game. Chapeau to Jimbo!
So you know we are on to you
Jani’s bike is great but we want the rest Jimbo!!!
BTW where’s the ransome note?
We don't stop playing because we grow old, we grow old because we stop playing.
George Bernard Shaw, 1856-1950
I love it Jimbo!
Way to get into the press scrum. Where you near Lyne?
And if you went home and put on a snuggie, but then admit to not having one……
"The most wasted day is that in which we have not laughed."
Is she Laotian?
just kidding, Lyne… I think she was in the press room, but if she was there, I have no idea since I’ve never met her. She might have been standing right behind me for all I know. There was only one female photog in there that I noticed and she did not look what I imagine Lyne to look like, i.e. she was not six feet tall with flaming red hair and a sword…
Where the #@&$ is my Time?
Very entertaining.
Good work!
"....Up Sestriere on a rental clunker in jeans and loafers? Brother, lemme buy you a beer."
by Rolls on Feb 16, 2009 8:39 AM EST reply actions
Jimbo - excellent job
I enjoyed your twitter humor throughout the day
great write-up
TIme for nostalgic flashback:
30 some odd years ago, there was this great restaurant up from the Russia River in Sevastopol (I think—I was a kid, ok . . .) that served practically EVERYTHING. It was a highlight of our trips to visit the g-parents in Petaluma to drive up there. Wondering what S-pol is like these days . . .
Haven't been there in years either
but my impression is that Sebastopol is… how to put it nicely… kind of crunchy?
Where the #@&$ is my Time?
Loved the tweets Jim. Had me laughing all afternoon.
The snuggie is very popular with the twitterati. Check out the snuggie tweets on twitter search:
LOL
So funny :-)
It’s all about the rubber boots.
And I think you want: Who needs… Not me. No “that’s”. Just trying to help out ;-)
Shut the fuck up Donny
"I didn't look for him and I didn't see him. If you base your race on another rider, most of the time you lose."
Tom Boonen
I can get you a toe
there are ways, Drewd… Hell, I can get you a toe by 3 o’clock…
Where the #@&$ is my Time?
Swells, could you please keep your voice down? This is a family blog.
"I didn't look for him and I didn't see him. If you base your race on another rider, most of the time you lose."
Tom Boonen
What in God's name are you blathering?
"I didn't look for him and I didn't see him. If you base your race on another rider, most of the time you lose."
Tom Boonen
I'll tell you what I'm blathering about!!!!!!
I’ve got information, man! New shit has come to light!
Sic gorgiamus allos subjectatos nunc.
Her life was in your hands!
"I didn't look for him and I didn't see him. If you base your race on another rider, most of the time you lose."
Tom Boonen
about?
Stupid non edit button
"I didn't look for him and I didn't see him. If you base your race on another rider, most of the time you lose."
Tom Boonen

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