Confessions of a Fixie Hater
"If you took a swaying, brainless, gazelle-like catwalk model and turned her into a bike, a fixie is what you’d get."
almost 3 years ago
crashdan
65 comments
1 recs |
Comments
I love riding a fixed gear sometimes. Fun.
And while I don’t like everythng the kids do to make their fixie bikes look nutty, I’d say fixies have gotten a lot of kids on bikes that would otherwise not be on bikes. So to me it’s all good.
"....Up Sestriere on a rental clunker in jeans and loafers? Brother, lemme buy you a beer."
by Rolls on Apr 16, 2009 10:30 AM EDT reply actions
pffft...pointless rant.
I have none of the “5 Inexplicable Fixie Fashions” on my Fixed Gear…does he hate me too? I will admit however, it is kind of an overdone, poser fad.
Allow me to restate what I’ve posted in the past, I ride a fixed gear cuz I can’t afford to upgrade my road bike. Its fun, easy to maintain and I don’t gotta shave my legs (anymore).
And, here’s a “+1” to whatever Demoncats says when he reads this article and responds below.
suck it, fixie h8rz
To be fair
The article is not a criticism of fixed gear bikes, per se – rather the stupid fashion fads that increasingly to go hand in hand with it.
I don't get it
Why hate on another cyclist? Doesn’t make sense.
When I'm on the mic, I'm like global warming, you can't ignore me.
by tehGrindCrusher on Apr 16, 2009 1:35 PM EDT reply actions
It's the Mods vs. Rockers all over again...
And the mods are going down… again…

Dude... why WOULDN'T Thor ride the chicken?
You sure it's not the dude in the suit...
…looking down his nose at Jimmy before he gets fired?
Be careful of becoming that guy.
The fixie hater in the thread article at the top mentions his "Dutch city bike"
Your link right here proves he’s a Stage 3 Snapperhead.
My prediction: within the next 2-5 years, these “Amsterdam Bikes” become the new, wannabe posing hipster trend in cycling. I promise not to author a “confessions of a Townie hater.”
Whatever.
It’s a bicycle, people. Just ride.
suck it, fixie h8rz
you're writing
BSNYC today, eh? :)
(And I promise that I didn’t laugh at the beginning of that post. At all. Nope.)
The View? Gawd that show.
A favorite of the collagen-lipped princess crowd. Barf!
"....Up Sestriere on a rental clunker in jeans and loafers? Brother, lemme buy you a beer."
by Rolls on Apr 17, 2009 1:32 PM EDT up reply actions
There's another thing I don't get
…bar pads.
When I'm on the mic, I'm like global warming, you can't ignore me.
by tehGrindCrusher on Apr 16, 2009 2:38 PM EDT up reply actions
Love the bar on that!
"....Up Sestriere on a rental clunker in jeans and loafers? Brother, lemme buy you a beer."
by Rolls on Apr 17, 2009 9:24 AM EDT up reply actions
Is that a 3-speed Randonneur type bar, flipped upside down?
I had an old Hercules 3-speed city bike, flipped over the bar like that, back in the college days.
"....Up Sestriere on a rental clunker in jeans and loafers? Brother, lemme buy you a beer."
by Rolls on Apr 17, 2009 9:38 AM EDT up reply actions
Thanks! I love it.
I built it from parts I bought on Craig’s list (except the bar and tape). The total cost was under $150.
I just switched back to my shiftie and I miss it.
by rocketpress on Apr 17, 2009 11:46 AM EDT up reply actions
I have a friend that calls me a fixie rider
when I am dong big climbs …
only one gear … the easiest one …. Mr Fixie …. not funny …. tired.
Separately, I am far too old to be cool enough to understand Fixie “dudes”
formerly known as cyclingchallenge
oooops
I’ve avoided posting my dong photos until now
English is my 17th language
formerly known as cyclingchallenge
... and here's my dong on Mt. Ventoux...
… and here’s my dong on Sestriere…
Will wondered why his neighbors always left his vacation slideshows with a look of pained horror on their face.
Dude... why WOULDN'T Thor ride the chicken?
they are at one with their bikes ...
actually here’s a link – poke around on this site and there is some explanation … http://www.oldskooltrack.com/files/home.frame.html
The sane ones
mount one brake. Some front, some rear. Otherwise you have to apply backpressure to the pedals, which is very tricky to do on a downhill or for a sudden stop. It can scare the crap out of you.
"....Up Sestriere on a rental clunker in jeans and loafers? Brother, lemme buy you a beer."
by Rolls on Apr 17, 2009 7:45 AM EDT up reply actions
Front brake on mine...
but, honestly, the more I ride, the more I notice myself not using it.
suck it, fixie h8rz
If you're looking for targets
…try here.
When I'm on the mic, I'm like global warming, you can't ignore me.
by tehGrindCrusher on Apr 17, 2009 9:02 AM EDT up reply actions
This site has an endless collection of fixies and fixie conversions
http://www.fixedgeargallery.com/
Those who like fixies: enjoy. Those who don’t: Moan til’ your hearts are content!
To my eye there are some really cool bikes on there, especially the vintage conversions and original track bikes. But there are also some hideous monstrosities on there too. Somewhere on there is a restored vintage bike that I hand-made a custom copper head-tube badge for….but I dunno exactly where it is.
"....Up Sestriere on a rental clunker in jeans and loafers? Brother, lemme buy you a beer."
by Rolls on Apr 17, 2009 9:35 AM EDT reply actions
What really pisses me off
are the fixie hipsters that weave through cars and pedestrians when running red lights. I suspect it’s because they’re not strong enough or skilled enough to stop.
Their behavior reflects poorly on all of us. And that’s not okay.
Agreed. But fear not, Darwin never sleeps.
So many of these hotdog guys learn the lessons the hard way, and end up taking themselves out.
I’d also point out that there are a lot of bike racer doctor/lawyer types around here who think their poop doesn’t stink when they are out on their $5k bikes, and they are very antagonistic to motorists, which causes problems for the rest of us. That’s just as bad.
"....Up Sestriere on a rental clunker in jeans and loafers? Brother, lemme buy you a beer."
by Rolls on Apr 17, 2009 10:17 AM EDT up reply actions
I agree completely.
I think it’s best nor to antagonize the motorists. They seem like an angry lot to me. Living in a big city full of crazy fools I’ve learned not to be this guy.

by rocketpress on Apr 17, 2009 11:00 AM EDT up reply actions
Maybe we can suit-up one day
and roam the streets looking for offenders…
by rocketpress on Apr 17, 2009 11:46 AM EDT up reply actions
I would like to have that hanging on my wall.
"....Up Sestriere on a rental clunker in jeans and loafers? Brother, lemme buy you a beer."
by Rolls on Apr 18, 2009 10:22 AM EDT up reply actions
OK if I can rant just a bit
what annoys me isn’t the bikes, which are beautiful…frankly it’s the attitude of some (there are tons of fixies where I live), maybe I’m projecting this onto them some, but a lot of these guys seem to think they’re god’s gift to cycling…and that everyone who rides a bike with a derailleur is somehow missing the boat, isn’t “really” cycling. On top of that they seem to think they’re the ultimate speed machines. Do they not realize that they’d get dropped within the first 5 minutes of a serious ride?
OK I know I sound kind of like an ass here, I don’t mean to be…and all you guys who have posted here obviously seem really cool. I’m probably way off in my opinions here. I had a good conversation on this site, a few months ago, asked why people want to ride fixed gear bikes. Got some great answers, one guy (maybe itswells, can’t remember) talked about how he loved to go on fixie rides in the winter, because he could get the same workout in 2 hours that he could get in 4 on a road bike. I thought that was cool. So, apologies if I’ve hurt anyone’s feelings…I’m just trying to understand, dammit! ;)
Yeah, I remember that thread, too.
I was looking for it but gave up.
No apologies necessary, Pliny. That’s what makes this place so great.
Re: “getting dropped within the first 5 minutes of a serious ride” – I can put one of those aforementioned bike racer doctor/lawyer types on their $5K dream machines in touch with local fixed gear legend, Big Jim of the north side of Va. Beach, for a 90 mile “Creeds Death Ride”, and he’ll make ’em want to find another sport.
suck it, fixie h8rz
ah...
yes I agree with you on that one though! Come to think of it I dislike the roadie poseurs even more than the fixie poseurs, at least the fixie poseurs are on a budget (most of the time). Then again maybe I’m a poseur too, that’s the problem with calling someone a poseur… Anyways good point about the serious fixies.
by plinytheelder on Apr 18, 2009 8:26 AM EDT up reply actions
Creed's Death Ride?
Dude... why WOULDN'T Thor ride the chicken?
by crashdan on Apr 18, 2009 12:13 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Sort of like telemarkers, then?
Full of righteous indignation that their way is the best.
Fortunately for me, being a loser with no life means I have no idea what’s cool and what isn’t.
When I'm on the mic, I'm like global warming, you can't ignore me.
by tehGrindCrusher on Apr 20, 2009 1:09 PM EDT up reply actions
Everyone hates telemarketers.
Oh, wait. Telemarkers. Hrm.
Oh, you know what? Let’s go with my first reaction.
To be honest,
There are times that I prefer telemarketers to pinheads. At least you can hang up on them or get on that no-call list. I wish that there was a no-call list for telemarkers.
When I'm on the mic, I'm like global warming, you can't ignore me.
by tehGrindCrusher on Apr 21, 2009 9:58 AM EDT up reply actions
nicer in the 'burgh?
Except maybe for the “exercise loop” and certain Saturday-morning-only riders, seems like every rider in town has given me a “hi there” wave (and not the one-finger version, either). Fixie couriers, the older commuter dude with the giant construction-zone-type flashing light bungied on his rear rack, bike punks (also often fixie— “cheap to maintain and fix”), students on hybrids and mountain bikes, couples on tandems, even little kids on trikes.
I have not seen top tube pads or spoke cards much, either. And don’t dis a Brooks on any bike. Though if you’re putting one on a streamlined fixie, and buying one new, may I suggest one of these? Or go for the green one.
















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