An Ardennes Haiku
by Chris... on Apr 17, 2009 3:17 PM EDT
in News
123 comments
Côte, Berg, Mur: in any language
the Ardennes ascents
still hurt like hell.
Show me what you got.
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haiku = 5/7/5
no? still, I enjoyed it.
by Merry Crankster on Apr 17, 2009 3:22 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
haiku for Davide
Amstel, Fleche, and Liege
Rebellin rides one more time.
Triple crown again?
by Merry Crankster on Apr 17, 2009 3:27 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Lets see,
You see all those climbs?
They separate the Ardennes
from the cobbled classics.
Brooklyn Chewing Gum: Vlaanderens Mooiste
by Koppenberg on Apr 17, 2009 3:32 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
I like the Ardennes
Even though the Italians
win most of the time
"Sean Kelly? Sorry, I am not so good with cycling history. I just want to race." --Edvald Boasson Hagen
by majope on Apr 17, 2009 3:36 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
here
Ciolek falls splat
J-Rod works for Valverde
Drunk fans don’t notice
by ursula on Apr 17, 2009 3:43 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
In the Netherlands
Wind blown cyclists climb quickly
To win the beer race
by William H on Apr 17, 2009 4:06 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Seeking victory
arrow of wallonia
flys up the steep mur
by William H on Apr 17, 2009 4:18 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Hey that's a nice one!
Beauty.
"....Up Sestriere on a rental clunker in jeans and loafers? Brother, lemme buy you a beer."
by Rolls on Apr 17, 2009 4:21 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
A race in Holland
is one where someone steals first
Rabo come second
Moreover, it is my opinion that Alejandro Valverde is an asshole who should not be allowed to compete in bikeraces right now.
by Jens on Apr 17, 2009 4:09 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Who can’t steal first. Duh.
Who is already at first,
What to be, Rabo?
by thisisntthezodiac on Apr 17, 2009 4:24 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
These bergs hold hard bite
These winds too hold roaring bark
Perhaps Puppy wins
"....Up Sestriere on a rental clunker in jeans and loafers? Brother, lemme buy you a beer."
by Rolls on Apr 17, 2009 4:14 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Nuts
Nuts, the Germans learned,
Wegman, It’s hard to attack,
Liege-Bastogne, nuts
General McAuliffe when asked to surrender Bastogne: “Nuts!”
formerly known as cyclingchallenge
by Willj on Apr 17, 2009 4:25 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
No disrespect meant
I am a big Wegman fan (and read a lot of history)
formerly known as cyclingchallenge
by Willj on Apr 17, 2009 5:02 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Funny, i'm just reading the Amstel-piece on PEZ
and looking at his picture I found myself thinking that Wegmann is a guy who really deserves a big win soon. Hard to not like a guy who rides with so much heart.
Moreover, it is my opinion that Alejandro Valverde is an asshole who should not be allowed to compete in bikeraces right now.
by Jens on Apr 17, 2009 5:06 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
yes, he's an exciting rider
just a little bit short of greatness (so far)
formerly known as cyclingchallenge
by Willj on Apr 17, 2009 5:29 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Are his legs really that little
I can’t quite figure out why he looks so short. Unless you cheated by tilting him forwards.
by Monty. on Apr 17, 2009 5:34 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I can’t quite figure out why he looks so short.
I am huge
formerly known as cyclingchallenge
by Willj on Apr 17, 2009 5:37 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
You can't bluff here
I’ll just wait for Ryan to appear and tell me exactly how tall you are, what size shoes you wear, how long your femur is, what angle your elbow works best at and how often you should shave your legs for optimal wind resistance on that particular bike.
by Monty. on Apr 17, 2009 5:40 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
No beach? No half-clothed
lean brown cyclists? Oh, hell—that’s
Amstel Curacao.
"Sean Kelly? Sorry, I am not so good with cycling history. I just want to race." --Edvald Boasson Hagen
by majope on Apr 17, 2009 4:26 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Them poor boys.
Mon coeur appartient à les forçats de la route.
by Josenka on Apr 17, 2009 4:42 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Hmmm...
Shit, I got nothin’
Had a late night with Jimbo
Awake by Sunday
Dude... why WOULDN'T Thor ride the chicken?
by crashdan on Apr 17, 2009 4:26 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Oh, Emilia
Spend a late night with Jimbo
Poor substitute was
Moreover, it is my opinion that Alejandro Valverde is an asshole who should not be allowed to compete in bikeraces right now.
by Jens on Apr 17, 2009 4:44 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Overdone:
Potent promises
Of golden beer ought to force
Racers to ride fast.
Daggered stare-downs ’twixt
Favorites leads feted field
To drown their sorrows.
Victory denied
To hungry Lottomen when
Dekker bonked on berg.
Cadel, where have you
Been? Wheelsucking so that I
Am declined the win.
Which skinny Schleck will
Fail to outsprint froth-mouthéd
Frenzied climbers? Both.
Cunego of bleached
Locks stands lower than others
On podium steps.
If Garmin grabs win
Will Vaughters forbid them beer
For it be “unfine.”
Beware those clothed
In black, be they from Caisse
or new Cervélo.
If old Tintin wins
All podium hottitude
Sadly disappears.
Mon coeur appartient à les forçats de la route.
by Josenka on Apr 17, 2009 4:41 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Nicely done!
Love the skinny Schleck one in particular.
"Sean Kelly? Sorry, I am not so good with cycling history. I just want to race." --Edvald Boasson Hagen
by majope on Apr 17, 2009 4:45 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Now what would happen if Frank and Andy have to sprint against each other for the win?
Mon coeur appartient à les forçats de la route.
by Josenka on Apr 17, 2009 4:51 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
"Andy, remember that time Dad asked where you were...
and I said you were over at Grandma’s? You owe me, bro."
"Sean Kelly? Sorry, I am not so good with cycling history. I just want to race." --Edvald Boasson Hagen
by majope on Apr 17, 2009 5:18 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Then again they could come across the line together...
Mon coeur appartient à les forçats de la route.
by Josenka on Apr 17, 2009 6:33 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
+1
although I hate to see Cervelo linked to Caisse. Especially for wearing black.
by Monty. on Apr 17, 2009 5:37 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
They're just different types of danger.
Mon coeur appartient à les forçats de la route.
by Josenka on Apr 17, 2009 6:32 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Jebus!
That be good stuff
Moreover, it is my opinion that Alejandro Valverde is an asshole who should not be allowed to compete in bikeraces right now.
by Jens on Apr 17, 2009 4:47 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
More like...
Tour de BS.
Mon coeur appartient à les forçats de la route.
by Josenka on Apr 17, 2009 6:35 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
lol, awesome
Alas, poor Rebellin, he will never win the hottitudde classification.
by gavia on Apr 17, 2009 6:28 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Alas indeed...
He is in a class of his own like Chickenman.
Mon coeur appartient à les forçats de la route.
by Josenka on Apr 17, 2009 6:32 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Btw, just noticed
love the sig line :-)
by gavia on Apr 17, 2009 6:33 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Finally someone noticed!
Too bad I have no Snuggie prizes to give away…
Mon coeur appartient à les forçats de la route.
by Josenka on Apr 17, 2009 6:34 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
lol, that's okay
Getting to be Spring/Summer in Cali – too warm for Snuggies ;-)
by gavia on Apr 17, 2009 6:46 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
If there were prizes, how about Champ Bear?
Mon coeur appartient à les forçats de la route.
by Josenka on Apr 17, 2009 7:01 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
And not the fact that
wherever he walks he leaves a little trail of hearts
by Monty. on Apr 17, 2009 7:05 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Don't forget the wee little heart on his derriere.
Mon coeur appartient à les forçats de la route.
by Josenka on Apr 19, 2009 8:06 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I totally had that bear as a kid!
Sadly, no sideways cap though.
by celerity on Apr 18, 2009 6:16 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Care bears!
I had so forgotten about them! I had a yellow one, once upon a time….
by Albertina on Apr 18, 2009 2:50 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Did it's name start with an "A" too?
Dude... why WOULDN'T Thor ride the chicken?
by crashdan on Apr 18, 2009 4:00 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
For sure. It was called Athanasius.
by Albertina on Apr 18, 2009 6:34 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I bet
that while your friends were hosting teddy bear tea parties, you were secretly using yours to reenact the seven ecumenical councils
by Monty. on Apr 19, 2009 6:57 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Hahaha!
You seem to know me so well…..vicar’s daughters are strange beings ;-)
by Albertina on Apr 19, 2009 7:23 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I can picture it now
He’s not stored on top of the wardrobe, that’s Simeon Stylites.
by Monty. on Apr 19, 2009 7:34 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
This is what happens when lapsed English/Literature majors have time to bullshit.
Mon coeur appartient à les forçats de la route.
by Josenka on Apr 19, 2009 8:05 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Cobbles are Ended!
Cheer Euskaltel-Euskadi
Hoste weeps softly
by William H on Apr 17, 2009 4:49 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Gora Basque Boyz
Rejoicing in green mountains
Samu takes the txapela?
by Albertina on Apr 17, 2009 5:18 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Woops, too many syllables...it's Friday night....I've had wine
by Albertina on Apr 17, 2009 5:19 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Danger in the grape!
Albertina’s haiku wrecked
by one glass too much
"Sean Kelly? Sorry, I am not so good with cycling history. I just want to race." --Edvald Boasson Hagen
by majope on Apr 17, 2009 5:23 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
this one made me truly laugh out loud
You may very well think that; I couldn't possibly comment.
by nicknorco on Apr 17, 2009 8:32 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Oui, very funny, and exactly right......
I slept for 12 hours last night!
by Albertina on Apr 18, 2009 2:50 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Climby Euskie hordes
Rejoice for lack of cobbles
Glory is orange
by Albertina on Apr 17, 2009 5:23 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Albertina dear
Tricky does the Haiku get
Mixing basque and wine
Moreover, it is my opinion that Alejandro Valverde is an asshole who should not be allowed to compete in bikeraces right now.
by Jens on Apr 17, 2009 5:25 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
lol
Distracted I got
By exciting pelota
On ETB Sat
Wine, pelota, verse
I know now they do not mix
Tough it is to multi task
by Albertina on Apr 17, 2009 5:32 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Oh no! I just did it wrong again!
I think I’d better go to bed now…….
by Albertina on Apr 17, 2009 5:33 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
and this one
You may very well think that; I couldn't possibly comment.
by nicknorco on Apr 17, 2009 8:33 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
SaminSane speeds down
Banshee on a brace of wheels
But Cauberg goes up
by Uncle Ted on Apr 17, 2009 5:15 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
just to be contrary
The Cobbles leaders
Now must fulfill their duty
by carrying water.
by jsallee00 on Apr 17, 2009 5:27 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
;)
I am just glad we are asked to do haiku
Iambic pentameter? now that would be difficult
formerly known as cyclingchallenge
by Willj on Apr 17, 2009 5:33 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
it shouldn't be that hard to count to five
it’s not like I’m missing any fingers…
by jsallee00 on Apr 17, 2009 5:37 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
nice theme regardless
Viva la Lactique
by nrs5000 on Apr 17, 2009 6:17 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
lol, very hard
which is why haiku it totally beyond my abilities.
by gavia on Apr 17, 2009 6:28 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I doubt that.
Modesty is nice though.
"....Up Sestriere on a rental clunker in jeans and loafers? Brother, lemme buy you a beer."
by Rolls on Apr 17, 2009 7:28 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
My head hangs today
for the first American
who won L-B-L
"Sean Kelly? Sorry, I am not so good with cycling history. I just want to race." --Edvald Boasson Hagen
by majope on Apr 17, 2009 5:30 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
I didn't see that one before I wrote mine.
:(
Go in peace, Tyler.
Get better!
Racing for Victory and Free Beer!
by DemonCats on Apr 17, 2009 9:27 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Beaten cyclist
Struggles over rainy hills
Race already lost
by William H on Apr 17, 2009 5:59 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Beautiful
Valiant he is
Sad his fate makes me. And still
my spirit he lifts
Moreover, it is my opinion that Alejandro Valverde is an asshole who should not be allowed to compete in bikeraces right now.
by Jens on Apr 17, 2009 6:10 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Ahh...
Like Yoda you speak
Good you look, in blue and gold
Too bad you’re from Norge
Dude... why WOULDN'T Thor ride the chicken?
by crashdan on Apr 17, 2009 7:12 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
can't resist
When 800 years
You reach look you this good youl
Will not young Jedi
Viva la Lactique
by nrs5000 on Apr 17, 2009 7:18 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Another typo
Where is the edit button
Please Sports Blog Nation
Viva la Lactique
by nrs5000 on Apr 17, 2009 7:20 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Tall, blonde, and Swedish
beat that for a chat up line
Mr motorbike man
by Monty. on Apr 17, 2009 7:24 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Unlike Swedes, I don’t
have to rely upon my
looks. I am German.
Dude... why WOULDN'T Thor ride the chicken?
by crashdan on Apr 17, 2009 8:04 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Short and Italian
yet still I have succeeded
my rule: learn to cook.
CQRanking.com, you complete me.
by Chris... on Apr 17, 2009 11:14 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Cooking is vital
knowing what you look like in
your Rock Racing kit
Dude... why WOULDN'T Thor ride the chicken?
by crashdan on Apr 17, 2009 11:19 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
and....
we’re done.
CQRanking.com, you complete me.
by Chris... on Apr 18, 2009 1:25 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
That's only four syllables
Dude... why WOULDN'T Thor ride the chicken?
by crashdan on Apr 18, 2009 1:52 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Dios mio man
That is bush league psych-out stuff
It’s laughable man
Moreover, it is my opinion that Alejandro Valverde is an asshole who should not be allowed to compete in bikeraces right now.
by Jens on Apr 18, 2009 2:30 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Traffic furniture
Descending steep berg or cote
Watch out Mister Schleck.
Viva la Lactique
by nrs5000 on Apr 17, 2009 6:21 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Tommeke doodsmak
Haussler on vacation too
Wake me in July
by samboo on Apr 17, 2009 7:33 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Remember Tyler
winning La Doyenne. Solo.
How many here smiled?
Racing for Victory and Free Beer!
by DemonCats on Apr 17, 2009 9:25 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
my white shorts are wet
rainy squishy and so wet
man these shorts are wet
by plinytheelder on Apr 17, 2009 9:59 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
just thought up another!
got me some black socks
putting on my high black socks
goin’ for a road ride
by plinytheelder on Apr 18, 2009 7:17 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
snort
And now, a stink joke:
What smells worse than Limburger?
The Cauberg.
by Steno on Apr 18, 2009 2:16 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
meant to say
And now, a stink joke:
What smells worse than Limburger?
The Cauberg, moron.
by Steno on Apr 18, 2009 2:19 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
race report by william blake
WALLONIE WONDER
SHOOTS ARROWS OF DESIRE FROM
CHARIOT OF FIRE!
by Steno on Apr 18, 2009 2:31 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
oopsies!
Mom! I won Bastogne!
No, baby, you gotta go
back to Liege now.
by Steno on Apr 18, 2009 2:51 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Frank Schleck can not sprint
past Cunego, Valverde
he must win alone
by mysterion on Apr 18, 2009 4:39 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Yesterday
Blue sea, green mountains
Riders attack, are brought back
Hard fought Turkish Tour
Loosli throws his bike
Stopped three times after a crash
Impey in Yellow
Hondo celebrates
but much too prematurely
Finetto takes it
Roubaix
Grey skinned bike riders,
mud covered, bruised and bloody,
most beautiful race?
Don’t compose Haiku
just before going to bed,
very hard to stop.
by William H on Apr 18, 2009 5:53 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
cannot write Haiku
that betters humour quotient
of entries above
You may very well think that; I couldn't possibly comment.
by nicknorco on Apr 18, 2009 9:48 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Much though I love you guys....
you’re all starting to scare me slightly….
Kidding…haiku are not the easiest things to compose – tell me again why we do these things?
Roll on Sunday and Amstel Gold (not that this has been one of the races that has caught the eye of Aussies, on the whole, given that we are sadly lacking in European racing….
"If winning isn't everything, then why do they keep score?" Unknown
by Jodes67 on Apr 18, 2009 11:13 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
like Leviathan
the bergs and cotes seems to be
nasty, brutish, short
Oh my, I've just fallen in love with Roger De Vlaeminck's sideburns.
by TheFigurehead on Apr 18, 2009 3:01 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
cotes? bergs? both go up
both sting the legs equally
hope the beer is cold
More Muur...
by Jimbo... on Apr 18, 2009 10:54 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
rather O/T haiku cycle
It’s pissing down rain
and I’m missing Amstel Gold
Is this race worth it?
Ten miles of this crap?
If at home I’d be watching
cycling. With coffee…
It hurts. On my wrist
the band says HTFU
Aw fuck. Keep going.
I once saw a shirt,
said: Toenails are for sissies
Now I understand
No kick for the line
But my son and I clasp hands
and cross together.
"Sean Kelly? Sorry, I am not so good with cycling history. I just want to race." --Edvald Boasson Hagen
by majope on Apr 19, 2009 1:32 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Ha Ha
when the going gets tough, the tough set about broadening their kids’ vocabulary.
by Monty. on Apr 19, 2009 1:57 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Aw, he's almost 14.
Soon he’ll be broadening my vocabulary.
"Sean Kelly? Sorry, I am not so good with cycling history. I just want to race." --Edvald Boasson Hagen
by majope on Apr 19, 2009 2:24 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
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