BREAKING: Tragedy Strikes Again?!
by Chris Fontecchio on Jul 28, 2009 1:58 PM EDT
in News
Email
Print
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but...
Police in Avignon, France have filed a missing persons report for Tourbecco, beloved July mascot of the Podium Cafe. Tourbecco was last seen Thursday in a sunflower field, a photo he emailed from the road to the Cafe, but has not been seen or heard from since. While police suspect foul play, they are not ruling the case a homicide yet. Details -- including some strange and shocking developments -- on the flip...
As I mentioned, Tourbecco was last seen in the photo widely shared here at the cafe from the sunflower fields. Police have actually recovered his iPhone, which contained several photos that lend some insight into what may have happened. Here they are:
There seems to be someone approaching...
What the...? Is it? Can it be??
Unfortunately this picture leaves little doubt: Girbecco has risen from the grave and seen fit to stalk his cousin, most likely as part of a generalized search of brains. Police found some blood at the scene, but no body and no brains, so the outcome of this confrontation remains unsolved. While expressing some surprise at the appearance of Zombie Girbecco, Avignon police and other officials have acknowledged the recent increase of zombism in the region. Stay tuned, we will post more details as they come in.
I for one am not assuming he's dead. Nevertheless, this has been a tragic year for our Beccos, and at midnight tonight I will commemorate their losses by pouring out 40 ouces of Oranjeboom on the ground, next to my laptop. Tourbecco, if you're out there buddy, stay well.
88 comments
|
1 recs |
Do you like this story?
Comments
damn
and i just posted erroneous info in the other post that savante and tourbecco were seen together heading toward switzerland. zombie-becco approaches quickly like cav behind haussler, however, the sky darkens and the sunflowers don’t move! this could be erroneous info from l’equipe. there is still hope andy stays with…wait, sorry, there is still hope tourbecco lives!
Incroyable! Incroyable! Incroyable!
Where's Vueltbecco. He's usually the peace-keeper right?
by whistlingmountain on Jul 28, 2009 2:07 PM EDT reply actions
You wanna try to keep peace between a smiling Tourbecco...
… and the slathering undead shattered-horn monstrosity that is Zombiecco? Good luck with that… Gooood luck…
Respect the Shit List; it respects you.
like Girbecco wasn't creepy enough
now I’ll have to sleep with the light on.
"I had a cameraman filming me on the back of a bike, I rode up to him and
said: 'hey, this is a pretty shitty situation, why don't you just leave me alone with my misery? I was close to punching him off his bike … but I didn't, of course."" Jens!
at least the image of zombiecco is SLIGHTLY less disturbing than the startling, headless pic
too too sad and distressing
Bah... Garmin.
yeah
how did his head get re-attached?
My suspension of disbelief is being pushed to the limit on this one
"I had a cameraman filming me on the back of a bike, I rode up to him and
said: 'hey, this is a pretty shitty situation, why don't you just leave me alone with my misery? I was close to punching him off his bike … but I didn't, of course."" Jens!
Expressed ability in the black arts...
… reanimation of previously dead tissue… creation of a hunger to destroy that which is in yellow… How did his head get reattached?
I’m guessing Bruyneel… and if you look closely, his head is stitched on…
Respect the Shit List; it respects you.
Geez...looks like Girobecco and DiLuca have been sharing needles...
BAH!!!!....Cavendish?!
TLP 7.0 Whereof one cannot speak, thereof one must be silent
Yeah...? Not.Buying.it.
This is another frame-job.
Look at the eyes. The pattern of approaching from behind. That is a costume worn to shift the blame.
Nice try, Swede
But this is not a Scooby-Doo episode…. Chris is not Freddy… Dan is not Velma…. This is serious, man! New shit has come to light!
I'll tell you what I'm blathering about...
I’ve got information man! New shit has come to light! And shit… man, Tourbecco kidnapped himself. Well sure, man. Look at it… a young cycling mascot, in the parlance of our times, you know, and he, uh, uh, owes money all over town, including to known pornographers, and that’s cool… that’s, that’s cool…
I’m, I’m saying, he needs money, man. And of course they’re going to say that they didn’t get it, because… he wants more, man! He’s got to feed the monkey, I mean uh… hasn’t that ever occurred to you?
Man?
Sir?
Respect the Shit List; it respects you.
you want a hoof? i can get you a hoof. believe me, there are ways.
Incroyable! Incroyable! Incroyable!
Also, dude?
Swede is not the preferred nomenclature. Pigment-deficient, please.
Brooklyn Chewing Gum: Vlaanderens Mooiste
No, Donny, these men are Norwegian, there's nothing to be afraid of.
Respect the Shit List; it respects you.
Look!
Just because we’re bereaved, that doesn’t make us saps.
Brooklyn Chewing Gum: Vlaanderens Mooiste
Tourbecco was a good mascot
He was one of us. He was a mascot who loved the outdoors, from the boulevards of Paris, to the lunar lanscape of Mt. Ventoux. He died as so many of his generation, before his time. In your wisdom, you took him, oh Lord, like you took so many bright promising beccos at Khe San, or Petite St. Bernard, or hill 235….
Strong men also cry Jens
Strong men also cry.
I do mind, the Dude minds. This will not stand, ya know, this aggression will not stand, man.
There's just one thing, Dude
Do you have to use so many cuss words?
Brooklyn Chewing Gum: Vlaanderens Mooiste
http://www.instantrimshot.com
"Jens! is my favorite rider. I love watching him handing out plates of hot, steaming suffer!" - Mahatma Gandhi
I thought I saw
A second ’becco on the grassy knoll beyond the sunflowers?
Jens Voigt doesn’t know where you live, but he knows exactly where you will die.
Someone must have taken the photos
Staring at the swim team gets you killed by a gang of dancing ninja men who know how to twirl.
by TheFigurehead on Jul 28, 2009 2:27 PM EDT up reply actions
Timed shutter release...
… I imagine Tourbecco was just trying to get the lighting and everything right… then… well… it’s just too horrible to contemplate.
Respect the Shit List; it respects you.
True
but we don’t like to talk about his romantic life. Such as it was…
ABRUZZIAM...uh oh
by Chris Fontecchio on Jul 28, 2009 2:28 PM EDT up reply actions
I know
the Dutch readers will understand the beer choice. That shit deserves to be poured out…
ABRUZZIAM...uh oh
by Chris Fontecchio on Jul 28, 2009 2:29 PM EDT up reply actions
and you ain't kidding.....a waste of perfectly good water that beer is
that could have been used to make drinkable beer…
BAH!!!!....Cavendish?!
TLP 7.0 Whereof one cannot speak, thereof one must be silent
by bradBordeaux on Jul 28, 2009 2:40 PM EDT up reply actions
Trader Joes
(big grocery chain) tried to get cred by selling that. “Look, Dutch beer for $6.50 a six-pack.” Overpriced at any price…
ABRUZZIAM...uh oh
by Chris Fontecchio on Jul 28, 2009 3:03 PM EDT up reply actions
Oh my. The things I've missed.... :-)
I love C, not because he rocks as a cyclist, but because deep down he's a band geek! LOL!
Hiya Nikki
a couple of things that might interest you
http://www.cyclismag.com/article.php?sid=5175
http://www.bretagne-vtt.com/TBF/TBF-2009-etape4lg-presse.htm (click on MG Final, bottom left)
http://courses.femininesassociees.over-blog.com/categorie-1228597.html (for the photos)
I assume that the cycling world in Chicago isn’t massive.
Ursula... shhhhh!
I have “no” idea what you’re trying to imply. ;-)
I love C, not because he rocks as a cyclist, but because deep down he's a band geek! LOL!
Oh Monty, how I have missed you. :-)
I sadly have to head to an hour long meeting but I’m looking forward to reading up some more here tonight. Been away far too long. :-)
I love C, not because he rocks as a cyclist, but because deep down he's a band geek! LOL!
It's fine for you all to joke around
when you’re on the safe side of the ocean.
sometimes life is a false flat
Shocking, shocking news.
It was sufficiently sad that Girbecco was so senselessly slaughtered by a sneaking snake of a Swede, but to see him surface as a soul-sucking zombecco scares the stuffing out of me.
Throughout the stage all I kept on thinking was: ‘don’t finish second, you can’t finish second again’.--Heinrich Haussler
Said Sylvester the Cat
ABRUZZIAM...uh oh
by Chris Fontecchio on Jul 28, 2009 5:55 PM EDT up reply actions
Clearly Photoshopped
The fact that the evil zombie Tourbecco is not wearing a Garmin kit is proof that this is not an actual depiction of the event. I think that time would be better spent searching the Garmin team vehicles than worrying about zombie mascots. Just remember there is make believe evil, and then there is real evil. Yeah I mean you JV.
whoa whoa
We knows he’s a murderous undead abomination, but who said anything about evil?
Brooklyn Chewing Gum: Vlaanderens Mooiste
So you're saying that Zombiebecco is just misunderstood? Is that it?
Like, say, Vino? Or the Chicken?
You see how calm Vaughters is? That’s because he’s really one giant seething ball of Evil inside. With like, extra Evil.
How dull would that be...
@Zombiecco BRAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Respect the Shit List; it respects you.
I think I might cry
I had to admit, I grieved a little when Girbecco died. Now Tourbecco. It didn’t have to be done, Chris. You could have made them all go on holiday, like the winners of The Running Man. Instead, I feel like jumping into a bath with my Gillette. It’s too much…
Let me tell you a little something about Whitman, Price and Haddad...
Respect the Shit List; it respects you.
They're running men. Last season's winners.
No. Last season’s losers.
Whoa, there, Runitout
No need to be hasty.
I agree that Chris could have hidden the awful truth from us, but what has come to pass has come to pass. ‘Jumping into a bath’ won’t bring them back.
(Oh, and if you’re that bloke from the Rabobank ads during the Tour: I hate you.)
Next thing I know you guys are going to tell me Santa doesn't exist.
Bruce – make them stop!!!
I love C, not because he rocks as a cyclist, but because deep down he's a band geek! LOL!
The bath? To shave?
That’s disgusting…sitting in your own filth. Yeeeeeech.
Shower Dude, shower.
I do mind, the Dude minds. This will not stand, ya know, this aggression will not stand, man.
What's your point Walter?
I do mind, the Dude minds. This will not stand, ya know, this aggression will not stand, man.
I don't need your fuckin' sympathy, man, I need my fucking johnson!
Respect the Shit List; it respects you.
What do you need that for Dude?
I do mind, the Dude minds. This will not stand, ya know, this aggression will not stand, man.
Hey, sewer rat might taste like pumpkin pie but,
I’d never eat the filthy motherfucker.
I do mind, the Dude minds. This will not stand, ya know, this aggression will not stand, man.
or they could have gone out to live at your aunt's farm.
George bunny-hopped my bike somehow. He's like a cat. -- cvv
This Zombiebecco is just the start of the trouble
apparently a lot of scary looking creatures have once again started roaming the earth as the undead.
First zombie goats, now zombie chickens...
are any barnyard animals safe?
On the other hand, MIlram was showing faint signs of returning to life at the Tour—if they come back from the dead, it can only be good for my VDS team.
Throughout the stage all I kept on thinking was: ‘don’t finish second, you can’t finish second again’.--Heinrich Haussler
He is a raceorganizers dream though
You can out him on a podium and he doesn’t block the view of any sponsormessages.
If any of you are impressed with his comments that he’s close to signing with a team, you should know that he has been saying that for 10 months now.
I'm also impressed how he beat like 23 random dudes out of a field of 24 in that race.
And got CN coverage for it, with pictures.
You see how calm Vaughters is? That’s because he’s really one giant seething ball of Evil inside. With like, extra Evil.
OMIGOD!
The dead have risen and are jacking up on EPO!!
ABRUZZIAM...uh oh
by Chris Fontecchio on Jul 29, 2009 11:36 AM EDT up reply actions
I bet Tourbeccow is sleeping pretty uneasy just now
he must feel like that girl from Final Destination 2
Comments For This Post Are Closed
Secondary Sidebar
User Tools
FanPosts
Community blog posts and discussion.
Recommended FanPosts
Recent FanPosts
Celebrate the Giro d'Italia at Podium Cafe!
Check our Giro Section for race updates, on-the-scene reports, and other hijinx.
Featured Stories
FanShots
Quick hits of video, photos, quotes, chats, links and lists that you find around the web.
Recent FanShots
