AGR VDS Smack Talk: Special Volcano Edition

by ursula on Apr 17, 2010 6:20 PM EDT

Okay, who you got? Anyone? Here's the current startlist. Start smacking!

Me? There's a race tomorrow? What-you expect me to come up with a team at a moments notice what with this volcano spewing rhyolite? That's not gneiss! Okay here's my team:

Oscarito "Better Than Bobo" Freire is my main man.

Luis Leon "I Heart Holland" Sanchez

Ryder "1st Place Or Bust" Hesjedal

Jurgen "Time To Get Ursula Some Points So I'll Place 15th" Van den Broeck

Lars "Where Did They Find Hills In Holland?" Boom

Martyn "I Hate Cobbles" Maaskant

Martin "Need A Lot More Volcanos Top Go Off Before I Have A Chance" Velits

Rafael "Can't Wait for the next TDU" Valls

I expect -755 points Yes, that's a negative number.

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Comments

Gilbert or a Schleck my picks

"the rest was over 30. And that doesn't mean old and useless, but experienced and with the stamina"

Jens! Voigt, Crit Intl Interview, 2009

by CycleGirl on Apr 17, 2010 6:23 PM EDT reply actions

I have...

Gesink. That’s my entire AGR team.

Contador and Mosquera are doing the business in CyL though.

by afx237vi on Apr 17, 2010 6:26 PM EDT reply actions

Expecting 0 points...

…out of:
Chris “Gives hope to all us old dudes” Horner

…Honestly, I just hope it’s a fun race – and we can see it on the internet…

by JustJoshinYa on Apr 17, 2010 6:28 PM EDT reply actions

I have J-rod and Cunego

Cunego better podium. I signed him for this week

by d rod on Apr 17, 2010 6:36 PM EDT reply actions

You should do really well.

by ursula on Apr 17, 2010 7:53 PM EDT up reply actions

Without really meaning to...

It seems I built my whole team around Ardennes week. I have:

Evans
Kolobnev
Nibali
Rodriguez
Horner
Valls
Cardoso

Cycling will always be a beautiful sport no matter how many people disgrace it.--Christian Vande Velde

by tgartner on Apr 17, 2010 6:52 PM EDT reply actions

Nice!

by Triki on Apr 17, 2010 8:40 PM EDT up reply actions

die mensch-maschine

manuel no-not-the-dead-composer cardoso
roman there’s-no-fucking-n-in kreuziger
darling niki terpstra
lars boom biddy bye bye

by discolite on Apr 17, 2010 6:56 PM EDT reply actions

Avoid meeting Terpstra

in hotel lobbies.

by tedvdw on Apr 17, 2010 6:59 PM EDT up reply actions

i definitely won't shake his

hand!

by discolite on Apr 17, 2010 7:03 PM EDT up reply actions

Team no. 1 is quite numerously represented

Freire
Martens
Gesink
Ten Dam
Kreder
Hoogerland
Gerrans
Van Den Broeck
A. Schleck
Cardoso
Quinziato

by tedvdw on Apr 17, 2010 6:58 PM EDT reply actions

I feel we will

OWN THE PODIUM!! (Canuckian readers may recognize this)

by tedvdw on Apr 17, 2010 7:05 PM EDT up reply actions

You better hope

that motto works better for you than it did for us.

by fancan on Apr 17, 2010 7:33 PM EDT up reply actions

you're fairly Rabo-heavy there

hopefully they’ll get the leadership thing hacked out in time, their team’s really strong.

by Triki on Apr 17, 2010 8:42 PM EDT up reply actions

Vino, veni, vici

Gesink..
Nieve!
Freire
Martens
Boom
A. Schleck
GvA?

by Frinking on Apr 17, 2010 7:02 PM EDT reply actions

Jens!“Ich liebe schmerz” Voigt
Damiano"I hate the VDS competition" Cunego
Sylvian"has the year started yet?" Chavanel
Martjian"am I still alive?" Maaskant
Jeff"Tour of Utah" Louder
Rafael"I can’t wait for the 2011 Tour de San Luis" Valls
Martin"lesser of the two" Velits
Good team on paper, but 2010 form has bit these guys in the ass.

Proud member of Thuggetz nation.

by Phil H. on Apr 17, 2010 7:05 PM EDT reply actions

I just lost a third of my smack talk.

I need Lulu there.

"It's a lovely thing, feeling that momentum. If you're lucky, it's also about grace." Tim Winton

by sminer on Apr 17, 2010 7:13 PM EDT reply actions

In Iceland they spew Basalt (or some other form of Fe rich magma), but that's a minor quibble.

by Christopher See on Apr 17, 2010 7:15 PM EDT reply actions

well...

roche
grivko
cunego
boom
carlstrom
deignan

hmmm…hopeful of at leas some points..come on puppy, get over your flu already!

"I was watching the Tour de France in 2005, just being a fan again. I thought, ‘you're a fucking idiot. You're a bike fan who gets to ride the Tour de France.'"
- david millar

by Ben Shave on Apr 17, 2010 7:16 PM EDT reply actions

Not expecting great things...

There are blanks on a couple of the teams that I have riders from.
Gerben Löwik
Roman Kreuziger
Andriy Grivko
Carlos Barredo Llamazales

Sidebar… Why do I have to prove I’m over 18 to access the startlists?

by Christopher See on Apr 17, 2010 7:28 PM EDT up reply actions

Beer site.

by fancan on Apr 17, 2010 7:34 PM EDT up reply actions

yep, amstel

lovely stuff

"I was watching the Tour de France in 2005, just being a fan again. I thought, ‘you're a fucking idiot. You're a bike fan who gets to ride the Tour de France.'"
- david millar

by Ben Shave on Apr 17, 2010 7:52 PM EDT up reply actions

Dumb.

by Christopher See on Apr 17, 2010 11:13 PM EDT up reply actions

anti-beerist

by Jens on Apr 18, 2010 3:43 AM EDT up reply actions

by tedvdw on Apr 18, 2010 4:45 AM EDT up reply actions

Irish power?

Winner of the 2010 Pavé d'Or: "My Cousin Vino"

by Josenka on Apr 17, 2010 8:16 PM EDT up reply actions

If the helocopters don't fly.

Will we see anything or do moto cameras upload to satellites?

by fancan on Apr 17, 2010 7:38 PM EDT reply actions

Found the answer on the other thread.

by fancan on Apr 17, 2010 7:45 PM EDT up reply actions

fyi, if you reply to a spammer, you too can be banned

"Wizard's first rule. People are stupid. They will believe anything they want to be true or fear to be true." -- Terry Goodkind

by umwolverine on Apr 17, 2010 7:56 PM EDT reply actions

That was random

Proud member of Thuggetz nation.

by Phil H. on Apr 17, 2010 8:03 PM EDT up reply actions

I'm thinking there was a spammer that was banned and the comment is gone.

by ZoeRochelle on Apr 17, 2010 8:05 PM EDT up reply actions

Maybe

I don’t think any PdC regulars are getting banned because of a snide remark to a spammer though, the comment will be deleted but banned?

Proud member of Thuggetz nation.

by Phil H. on Apr 17, 2010 8:07 PM EDT up reply actions

Yep

And that’s what happened!

by ursula on Apr 17, 2010 11:19 PM EDT up reply actions

Wait, the deleting or the banning?

Proud member of Thuggetz nation.

by Phil H. on Apr 17, 2010 11:26 PM EDT up reply actions

the former

by ursula on Apr 18, 2010 1:24 AM EDT up reply actions

Does that mean I have to return the shoes?

Bicycling is the nearest approximation I know to the flight of birds. Louis J. Helle, Jr.

by flying dog on Apr 17, 2010 9:18 PM EDT up reply actions

comment of the day.

by ursula on Apr 17, 2010 11:20 PM EDT up reply actions

Pilsner is in my team name so I better do well at the Bier Race...

Pigseye Pilsner Pandemonium starring:
Carlos "Lost to Burghardt: Barredo
Ryder “The Canadian, Eh?” Hesjedel
Vincenzo “Il Cannibali” Nibali
Danny “Patience” Pate
Marco "Piñata: Pinotti
Manuel “Lost Manual” Quinziato
Nicholas “Roche Motel” Roche
Laurens “El Aurens” Ten Dam

With no special appearances by:
Luis Leon “Not The Other Sanchez” Sanchez

Winner of the 2010 Pavé d'Or: "My Cousin Vino"

by Josenka on Apr 17, 2010 8:16 PM EDT reply actions

Crank Addicts are now Ardennes Addicts

Apparently, I like Ardennes-type riders, A LOT! I’m coming into Ardennes week loaded for bear. I have:
Vorganov, Kreuz, Nibali, Philippe, D. Moreno, Boom, Mathias Frank, Deignan, Van Den Broeck, Langeveld, Nordhaug

@Josenka
Roche Motel lol good one!

Fabian Cancellara walks into a bar. "I'd like Tom Boonen on the rocks...make it a double."

by 4estru on Apr 17, 2010 8:19 PM EDT reply actions

Team UUNNGGHH!! has

Bags, Shoes, Watches, all at a fraction of their usual retail price!

Also riders in the Amstel Gold Race. How about:
Cadel ‘Tell me again who’s not racing. Woohoo! Haha! Again, again!’ Evans
Nicolas ‘The Irishest climby sprinty guy in France’ Roche
Manuel ‘the clean Portugese rider’ Cardoso
Lars ‘Rabo custody battle child’ Boom
Greg ‘Van’ Avermaet
Xavier ‘I can hide behind lampposts like they do in cartoons, only for real’ Tondo
Joaquin ‘Jose Rujano’s choice’ Rodriguez

by Triki on Apr 17, 2010 8:21 PM EDT reply actions

Lekke Band of Brothers needs a 1, 2, 3 …

… with these guys:

1. Gerrans
2. Gesink
3. A. Schleck

"I was born. I grew up. I obeyed my parents. I became a professional cyclist."
– Andrei Tchmil

by Jiggs on Apr 17, 2010 8:38 PM EDT reply actions

I didn't even know what Ardennes meant when I found this site/made my team

But now I’m ready to ~~conquer it~~ do decently.

Amstel:
Cunego
Gesink
Rodriguez
Nibali
Van Den Broeck
Maaskant
M. Frank

Van Summeren and Uran M.I.A.

by fineco on Apr 17, 2010 8:40 PM EDT reply actions

For once, my team is actually semi-strong and can get me some points. I can't wait for May/June to roll around

Rafael Vall—————Surprise me
Anthony Roux———Surprise me
Mich Kreder- I promise to sprint better than the first place outside the points
Vincenzo Nibali- Hanibali the Canibali
Roman Kreuziger
Lars Boom- I’m large and in charge
Robert Gesink- I promise not to run outta gas this year, boss
Tony Martin——Surprise me
Peter Velits—-surprise me

Hopefully a podium and some top 10’s after Fat Schleck crashes most everybody else out.

Tommeke!, Tommeke!, Tommeke!, Tommeke!

by Vlaanderen90 on Apr 17, 2010 9:06 PM EDT reply actions

Talent.

Pozzato
Gasparotto
Boom
Oscarito
M. Velits
Evans

by ELVISGOAT on Apr 17, 2010 9:50 PM EDT reply actions

I have hope

Evans
Routlston
Hesjedal
Kreuziger
Boon
Fuglsang

"Woof, woof, woof! That's my other dog imitation."

by Drew Davis on Apr 17, 2010 10:19 PM EDT reply actions

Boon?

by Triki on Apr 18, 2010 12:43 PM EDT up reply actions

Here we go.

The Mighty Maaskant
The brother of the good Velits.
Mathias Frank
Marcel Wyss

Looks like a podium sweep to me.

"Some people are like slinkies - not really good for anything but they bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs."

by jsallee00 on Apr 17, 2010 10:42 PM EDT reply actions

The brother of the good Velits.

That is some funny shit!

Thank you for returning to my life cross season!

by australopithecine on Apr 17, 2010 11:04 PM EDT up reply actions

Boom, ten Dam, and Chavanel in the main VDS.

Evans, Gerrans, Deignan, and Vaugrenard in the Ed League.

If Cavendish was a diplomat, the third world war would have started a long time ago--Brian Holm

by majope on Apr 17, 2010 11:07 PM EDT reply actions

J-Rod, Sulzberger, Large Bomb, Frank, Andy, Kristoff……

My modest hopes are to sweep the podium :D

by Wavell on Apr 17, 2010 11:11 PM EDT reply actions

Vlaanderen's Mooist has:

Damiano “tranquilo” Cunego
Manuel “peligroso” Cardoso

Vlaanderens Mooiste

by Koppenberg on Apr 17, 2010 11:11 PM EDT reply actions

I have:

Gesink
J-Rod
Pozzato
Downing
Tony Martin
Horner
Capecchi
Cardoso

Wiggins is supposedly stuck in spain because of a volcano. I haven’t found why SamSan isn’t racing and apparently Kirchen doesn’t exist this year.

by brunopitton on Apr 17, 2010 11:12 PM EDT reply actions

My tiny team

Frank Schleck. Carrying Carlos Sastre’s pacifier for the finish.
Johnny Hoogerland. Will be drug tested three times during the race, but should do fine.
Michel Kreder. Boogerd with smaller teeth
Nicholas Roche. Leader of the fearsome brown and blue.
Manuel Cardoso. Who is not J.I. Gutierrez

by Mr 60 Percent on Apr 17, 2010 11:30 PM EDT reply actions

Im hoping for a one two, thats the only way i salvage this race

Frank “i wont schleck it up” Schleck
Vincenzo “Ca-” Nibali (guess thats the well accepted nickname)
Jakob “Fool’s Gold” Fuglsang
Ivan “Why would you pick me up anyway” Rovny
Andre “anonymous” Steensen

by agl on Apr 17, 2010 11:43 PM EDT reply actions

Other than Niki Terpstra,

name someone on Fromagerie Duval’s elite AGR team (Freire, Gesink, Kreuziger, Hesjedal, Vaugrenard, Roche, and Monfort )will not score VDS points in this race….chirp, chirp…I couldn’t either.

by M. Anatole on Apr 18, 2010 12:36 AM EDT reply actions