FanPost

Cold Fusion Bicycles Power 2031 'Le Tour de France'

This year's "Le Tour de France" will feature the Improved Fusion Powered Bicycle or ‘Super Bike’. The race will run the first 3 weeks in July, 2031 {the rule of 21 applies}.  Eighty percent of the 180 riders will be riding these powerful machines during the 4,785 kilometer trek through France. The 'Superbike' will bear approximately 40% of the work load for the operators.

Basically the motor is powered by Cold Fusion; which is a low energy nuclear reaction.

The motor is a worm driven mechanism set vertically in the seat shaft of the body of the bike.

Body fluids (perspiration & urine) are collected and channeled from the inner lining of the body suit through the Fizik tube into the combustion chamber [the upper, horizontal, tubing of the frame]. There the liquid is ionized using Solar Energy Charges, [also collected and distributed through the body suit]. As the liquid separates into oxygen & hydrogen the chemical reaction generates heat and releases energy. The Hydrogen Isotope is then super heated and propels the ‘worm gear drive’, transferring torque to the crank, thus substantially assisting in powering the machine up the road. For further explanation see "future site of Cold Fusion.com".

The next 3 weeks will again be a contest of Nerves, Stamina, Teamwork, Persistence, Integrity, Logistics, Communication, Diet, Recovery, and a myriad of other, often conflicting, dynamic forces, including Gravity. These riders, 23 females qualified, will also be assisted by the new "Seeing Eye Dog" handle bars (or Labradoodle). The "Eye" emits an infrared beam, some 50 meters ahead, and the on board computer (HAL-Heat Activated Labradoodle) detects changes in the coefficient of friction on the yet to be traveled surface. HAL will also sense irregular performances of other machines directly in the operator’s path, applying the synchronized air brakes at light speed; this means fewer In-Ordinate Malfunctions (Crashes). Lastly, the standard multi purpose protection Helmut operates the gear changes by mere thoughts of the rider (a.k.a. Firefox), and is the omnipotent radio communications transceiver for each team.

          The 2031 edition of "Le Tour" promises to be fast & exciting. Albeit the financially challenged teams (the poor saps) that still run motors using batteries may not even complete the race [rule 375 still applies ‘...must carry all used batt’s to finish line….’]. I am certain that the people involved in the production of this event 20 years ago would have clearly tagged the ‘Super Bike’ as Cheating!, where as our generation simple considers it Progressive Competitiveness. I say "Get off your futon and join the 21 century!" Any sane person wouldn’t expect a professional cyclist to traverse 2 ITT’s over 100k/ea. + 10 stages of 300K/ea. + 8 mtn. Stages of 200K/ea. & 29 cat’ climbs using mere battery powered bikes. Now would you???

          Don’t forget to join us each day here at the Podium Café’, your #1 online Cycling Crazy Circle, as we Inspect, Detect, & Inject our perspective on this Colossal Galactic Event.

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