9 pm Pacific on Friday is the deadline to get your teams in for the best damn bike contest on the planet!
It all began last October. In the boreal forest of southern Sweden, Jens throughly broke down the previous women's cycling season and reconstituted the riders into the perfection that is the women's price list. Simultaneously in Portland, yours truly distilled the essence of each men's rider into pure numerical being to better
screw with you convey the true worth of each rider.
From there, Jens and I humbly submitted the results of our thousands of hours to PdC HQ in Seattle where Fearless Leader Chris... Fontecchio examined the spreadsheets with mounting dismay. Soon the eruptions, the earthquakes appeared. "STEVENS COSTS 55?????? BOONEN %$#%$# 26???%$##$#$@ YOU TWO HAD BETTER EXPLAIN YOURSELVES OR YOU'LL BE GETTING A SERIOUS DOSE OF SEATTLE FISH JUSTICE!!!" Understandably Jens and I cowered under our beds. Later, after Chris took the appropriate sedatives, we talked it out, even grudgingly adding a race with the word "Lazio" in it's title. (Later that race was contacted by known "associates" of Fontecchio: they quickly realized the error of their ways and changed the name of the race to Roma Maxima.)
All eyes then turned to mighty mighty Holland where SuperTed in his underwater lair was updating the FSA-DS website with the new prices and races electron by electron. When he finished the 2013 FSA-DS competition was rolled out for all to partake in.
As of this moment 581 men's teams and 186 women's teams have been submitted, leaving at least 47 more women's teams and 241 men's teams in various states of incompleteness. But the time is fast approaching...less than 30 hours from now the deadline for new submissions will have arrived. YOU do NOT want to be SOL DO YOU? TIME TO GET YOUR TEAM IN!
You could have an excuse for delaying until now. I have one and I'd like to share with you all because sharing is good. I have one slot open on my mens team worth 2 points. I've come down to to riders, 2 sprinters, who as it happens are facing each other at the Tour de Langkawi this week. Two sprints to determine which of Bryan Coquard or Steele Von Hoff get the coveted last spot on BUILT FOR COMFORT NOT FOR SPEED and who will be lost in the wilderness for another year, bereft of friends. The first sprint was last night and somewhere way behind the vapor trail that was Theo Bos, Coquard snagged second place, while Steele only managed fourth. The last stage is late tonight (from where I live) and Von Hoff is down to his LAST CHANCE. Will he do it? Will the crafty kid Frenchy beat the Aussie again? This is what I am waiting for before I submit my team tomorrow.