In light of the resent Cav’s 100 Pro Victory. Few reminders and Rules reinforcements.
Always describe Cav’s wins as boring and predictable.
Always find an excuses for other sprinters beaten by Cav, as for example: he starter sprint from too far away, he has no train, he was blocked etc. etc.
When in doubt, who caused a crush right before the finish line - always blame Cav!
Always critic Cav’s choices of clothing, equipment, friends and especially girlfriends!
Remember his weight is always is a fair game, even when he is trim and fit!
Never fail to mention Ice-cream truck when talking about Cav during mountain stages. Remember people are very visual.
Actually only talk about Cav during a mountain stages when he is mere mortal and never reveal the size of a Grupetto, let people think that he is there alone the last of the stragglers.
Use your weapons often! Say “Bah!’ in every occasion, even when it is completely illogical to say “Bah!” say it any way! The more people will spend time thinking what you mean by that, the more chances that they will miss Cav s another, unfortunate, moment of his, so call, “greatness“.
Work with our young members. Remind them that to be a Cav’s fan is very mainstream. Remind them not to sell out, to be hip, to be a Cav’s haters!
And above, all always remember cornerstones of our principals and believes:
Earth is flat! Sun is spinning around the Earth! Cav is not the Greatest Sprinters of all times!
Bah! Bah! Bah!