This will be short...
Tom Boonen: Winner!! Think I'm too slow to win a stage? Whoosh! Want my green jersey? Yoink! Just when the door seemed open to a flood of contenders, Tommeke slams it shut. He has learned how to ride a Tour, it seems, and his speed is apparently back.
All the other sprinters: Losers! But we'll cover this in the power poll.
Andreas Kloden: Loser. Biver says he's "demoralized." Which makes me think his little trip back to the cars today was to ask if he could step off the bike. This totally sucks, but he's done.
Cycling fans: Winners!! We survived the flat stages and the interminable wait for the race to begin.