The idle times of winter... so perfectly arranged for the snark-fest that is every new kit rollout season. Let's face it, every single one of us is an expert in fashion and design, so when the new kits are released, we possess the highest form of authority to judge them. And judge them we will.
Here we go, first out of the gate with their new 2015 fashion statement is FDJ, pictured above. Let's break it down!
Where they came from:
Photo by Lionel Bonaventure, AFP/Getty
Did anyone not like last year's kit? Blue is beaten to death, except when it's a particularly nice shade of blue, which this is. Very bleu, very France. Very cool. I would guess that some people considered it their favorite (low bar alert!).
Where they're going:
White shorts. Quite a lot of white, actually. You have to ask yourself, how much more white can you get? And the answer is none. None more white. I guess they were pretty psyched about Pinot winning the maillot blanc last season, since that'll be their look all year long.
I think we should do this by keyword. I'll offer a few choices, based on the 1-5 scale...
5: Stunning! I'm buying this. Swoon!
4: Solid! I'll buy it on sale. I'll root for them inexplicably.
3: Not bad. I wouldn't reject a gift of this jersey. I won't hold it against them.
2: Ugh. Wouldn't wear this in public. I might root for them out of pity.
1: Why God? WHY?! Don't even show this to me. I will root for them to win their national championships to spare us all the misery of this kit.
My pick: Why God? WHYYYYY!?!?!
If I were reviewing this as they panned up from the rider's feet, I would start by complimenting the nice red and blue bands on the shorts, stopped breathing as they panned the crotch/waist, and left the room by the time they reached the last ab.
OK, weigh in here. Also, upload any new kit photos in comments and I'll add reviews to this post. At some point maybe they'll get their own post. Or maybe! You'll concoct a whole new post to introduce them in fanposts, and I'll promote it. Plans are evolving...