But it's still road cycling season!
The hell it is. No matter how many kimono's you make Sagan wear, it's done. Finito. Don't cry, we'll be back cycling amongst the kangaroos before you know it. Until then: watch some goddamn cross.
But I don't know anything about cyclocross!
Well, since you're here I assume you know what a bike is. Meadows aren't strange to you earthling, I take it. And you probably also know what a cobble is. If you don't, pretend. The boss reads this too. Anyway. You know bikes, you know grass, you know cobbles. You're ready to watch some goddamn cyclocross.
But the same dude always wins!
After watching him win GW, RVV, three Tour stages, the green jersey, Quebec and the Euro Champs; did you still watch the worlds knowing full well Sagan would win that also? Yeah? You have no excuse: watch the goddamn Koppenbergcross. At least in cx it's one of two dudes who usually win.
But I don't like cycling that doesn't go up mountains!
It's the goddamn Koppenbergcross. Koppen. Berg. Cross. BERG! A berg is a mountain.Watch the goddamn race.
But I watched last year so I already know what it's like!
It's different this year, so shut up. This year they finish all the way up the Koppenberg. No more chickening out half-way up the hill, this year the finish is right at the very top. Also, they start at the bottom so it's cobbles and inclines from the get go. So you don't know what it's like. Just watch the goddamn cross.
But cyclocross is so sexist!
Well, unfortunately the world is sexist. But tomorrow it's just a little more female friendly, as both the women's and the men's races will be shown live. Watch. The goddamn. Cross.
If you wanna watch the goddamn cross - and clearly there's no reason why you shouldn't - you can tune in at 13.45h CET for the women's race, Sporza starts 15 minutes earlier, and 15h for the men's race.
ps - since 1 November, All Saints Day, is a day one typically spends with family over here, I'll be watching this from the comfort of my grandma's living room. There will be beer, and if luck is on my side my grandma will have her world-famous profiteroles. They're the size of cobblestones. But I will be with you in spirit, and if I manage to find something resembling an internet connection, I'll even talk to you lot.